Web Experts: New Social Website to Outpace Twitter

MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. – With the Silicon Valley’s eyes focused on Twitter’s initial public offering on Wednesday – expected to put the company’s market capitalization between $14 and $18 billion – another new comer to the social media space will also debut its stock this week, possibly surpassing the microblogger’s value.

Despite having less than a quarter of Twitter’s users, $100 million less in annual revenue than the microblogger, and having yet to show a profit, Silicon Valley venture capitalists and a Greenwich, Conn., hedge fund manager see a robust future for FuckyouIhateyou.com (Ticker: FUKU).

“Hate can be perpetual and now there’s an ad play for that,” said Diane Smartskey, managing director at venture fund Market Stretch in Menlo Park, Calif. “Besides, it’s easy to understand.”

“Nobody like really likes anyone,” said Joseph Lindler, managing director of hedge fund OPM in Greenwich, Conn. “I hate being friends on Facebook – as well as LinkedIn.”

FuckyouIhateyou.com shows promise as the Valley’s next hot stock when it starts trading on NASDAQ on Friday, with a valuation, some experts say, reaching $20 billion.

“This thing could easily have a market capitalization of $20 billion by Friday afternoon,” said Smartskey.

Initially the website offered shares at $40. But as the frenzy over the website’s potential increased, the per share price jumped, at first, to $45 and, then, later, to $60, optimism for the website’s future grew.

"Right now, the sky's the limit on the stock price," Smartskey said

“The best thing they have on their website is the ‘b.s.’ button,” she added.  “It allows users an opportunity to tell people what they think of their posts and, if you’re really angry, there’s even one with the letters “f.y.”

Hate groups and racist ones, like the Ku Klux Klan and the Black Muslims, are sponsoring these buttons so every time a user clicks on them, a message from the group pops up in their feed – and gathers up all their personal information so they can be added to their mail lists or be targeted to attend a cross burning or any other event a hate group is planning.

Other major advertisers include the National Rifle Association, Planned Parenthood, divorce attorneys, political parties as well as therapists offering services to help people overcome their hate.

FuckyouIhateyou.com has become the place where people, of all stripes, tell others what they really think of others – out in the open for everyone to see.

“Right after John Kerry was sworn in as secretary of state, Hillary Clinton became a user,” said Bonnie McMurtey, a San Francisco-based Internet industry observer.  “President Obama was first on her shit list, so you can see where this thing’s going.”

“We’ve got Democrats hating Democrats, Republicans hating Republicans, Republicans hating Democrats, Democrats hating Republicans – and Tea Party people hating everyone, including one another,” said the website’s 28-year-old CEO, Joe Lee. 

“Vladimir Putin hates Obama; Obama hates German Chancellor Angela Merkel, who’s also hated by Putin, as well as by most of Greece; and the Syrian president – what the fuck’s his name? – hating Obama,” he added.

It’s a great place for divorced couples, too.

“People drop friends, husbands, wives and lovers – sometimes even their siblings and their children – on Facebook and professional colleagues on LinkedIn and then use those names to build out their shit lists on FuckyouIhateyou,” said Alliance Capital Managing Director Marvin Stumps in an earlier interview, before the website announced it would go public.

Alliance Capital, also based in Menlo Park, was an early stage investor in FuckyouIhateyou.com and stands to make billions when the stock starts trading.

Hate groups are forming on the website, too, says McMurtey.

“The Starbucks one hates the Dunkin’ Donuts one,” she said.  “Just like McDonald’s customers can’t stand Burger King people.”

Berkshire Hathaway Chairman Warren Buffet also uses the website.

“He hates the website but loves our financial performance,” Stumps said, "which is why he owns millions of shares.

The site has an international version, too, for places like Afghanistan, Iraq and other countries at war. 

“Afghanistan is a particularly wonderful place for FuckyouIhateyou.com,” said McMurtey.  “There are whole families and clans hating other whole families and clans – for centuries! – which only increases user lists, propelling more ad dollars from various international arms dealers.”

Obamacare and the new drug policy

WASHINGTON – As the Obama Administration recoils over its inability to launch its health insurance website on time, White House spokesman Jay Carney, on Friday, announced the government’s new drug policy, called “No Secrets.”

The government, he said, reached an agreement late Thursday night with some of the country’s leading social media websites and the world’s largest search engine, Google, which, he says, “ensures Americans will have full access to their prescription drugs.”

Under the new policy, which will become effective January 1, 2014, pharmaceutical companies will “friend” their patients on Facebook. 

“No one will be allowed to reject these ‘friend’ requests because, with the government’s approval, Facebook will build a profile of the drugs each of their users are taking – under a doctor’s guidance, of course,” Carney said.

It’s expected, Carney said, Facebook will make everyone’s drug profile searchable – both in and out of the social media website.

“Think about it about this way – not only do your friends want to be friends with you on Facebook but so do your drugs,” said Mark Zuckerberg, the website’s chief executive officer, in a prepared statement.

“The next time you’re at the pharmacy, and you’ve forgotten what pills you’re taking, Facebook will be there to help,” Zuckerberg said.  “Either you call up your drug profile on Facebook, using your smartphone, or your pharmacist does on their desktop computer.

“Either way, you’re covered,” he added.

LinkedIn, a leading website for working professionals, is also part of this new policy, Carney said, because they’ll add a section to each users profile, detailing the drugs they’re taking, the amount and how often they’re required to consume them.

As with Facebook, this section of each drug profile will be made fully available for anyone to see – in and out of the website.

“Users of Viagra, Cialis and antidepressants – whatever people are taking – will be able to joke with one another about their experiences on these drugs and hire one another, too, maybe even become friends,” Carney said.

Google will take the information assembled by Facebook and LinkedIn and create searchable profiles, detailing the medicine each patient is taking, he said.

“As of now, we don’t think this new policy require anything extra, like search engine optimization,” Carney said.  “Regular algorithms should work.”

A different twist

MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. – The newest social networking website comes with a whole new twist: Instead of encouraging its members to connect with friends and professional acquaintances, this one wants people to round up folks they may never have considered – their enemies.

“FuckYou-IHateYou.com,” funded by Silicon Valley venture capital firm Alliance Capital, claims more than 10,000 members and another 1,000,000 enemies.

“Unlike your average LinkedIn member, or Facebook friend, our members aren’t full of shit,” said James Lee, the 24-year-old chief executive officer of FuckYou-IHateYou.com. LinkedIn was one of the first companies to establish itself in the social networking space.

“The average member of our site has around 100 enemies and they hate each and every one of them – with a passion,” said Lee.

“Let’s face it, no one who connects with someone on LinkedIn or any of those other social sites really wants to be someone’s friend,” said Lee. “It’s just a place for frenemies.

“Our members are honest. If they say they hate you, they really hate you,” Lee added.

Lee, who started FuckYou-IHateYou.com during his freshman year at Stanford University, says that members of his site just list their enemies.

“There’s none of this BS like asking for permission to be someone’s enemy. Our members just list their enemies and that’s it. They’re done!”

Members can view one another’s enemy list, Lee said, to make sure they’re hating “the right people.”

“If you and another member have someone you hate in common, that’s even better,” said Lee.

When told that his site sounded like another version of President Richard Nixon’s enemy list, Lee, looking confused, asked, “What was he president of?”

Members of FuckYou-IHateYou.com are encouraged to increase their enemies list as fast as possible.

“The member listing the most enemies any given week can win prizes, trips – even a car,” said FuckYou-IHateYou.com’s membership vice president Toby Benwick.

Perfect people to list as enemies, Lee said, include “anyone who ever dissed you or anyone you refer to as ‘ex’. That could be an ex-girlfriend, wife, husband, boyfriend, lover, employee.

“Bosses are always good,” he added.

Members are encouraged, Lee said, to post pictures and video clips of the people they hate.

“Our staff always does a round of high fives if a member’s enemy dies,” said Benwick. “That’s just the coolest.”

Unlike Facebook, which has a “like” button people can click when their friends post something, at FuckYou-IHateYou.dom, there’s a button marked “BS”.

Membership to the website is free. Sponsors for it include divorce attorneys and various hate groups, including the Ku Klux Klan. Not to be outdone, the Nation of Islam is considering what Benwick describes as a “huge” sponsorship opportunity on the site.

Lee says he’s also heard from the Tea Party as well as groups identifying themselves as politically progressive.

“We’re bipartisan in our hatred,” he said.

Not to be outdone by a certain leading executive at a leading social networking website, FuckYou-IHateYou.com’s CEO Lee announced that he, too, just signed a deal with Random House to write a book.

It’s entitled “Stop #@$%& Leaning on Me:  Get a Life, Damnit!!!!”

Details are being finalized, Benwick said, for some of the site’s members and their selected enemies to make special appearances on various daytime television talk shows.

“We look forward to our first smack down with the FuckYou-IHateYou.com people,” Jerry Springer said through a spokesman for his television show.

New Social Networking Site -- Funded & Thriving

MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. – The newest social networking website comes with a whole new twist: Instead of encouraging its members to connect with friends and professional acquaintances, this one wants its members to list their enemies.

FuckYouIHateYou.com, funded by Silicon Valley venture capital firm Alliance Capital, claims more than 10,000 members and another 1,000,000 enemies. 

“Unlike your average LinkedIn member, our members aren’t full of shit,” said James Lee, the 24-year-old website's chief executive. 

“The average member of our site has around 100 enemies and they hate each and every one of them – with a passion,” Lee added. “Let’s face it, no one who connects with someone on LinkedIn or any of those other social sites really wants to be someone’s friend. It’s just a place for frenemies to meet.

“Our members are honest," he continued. "If they say they hate you, they really hate you."

Lee, who started FuckYouIHateYou.com during his freshman year at Stanford University, says that members of his site just list their enemies. 

“There’s none of this b.s. like asking for permission to be someone’s enemy. Our members just list them -- done deal!” 

Members can view one another’s enemy list, he said, to make sure they’re hating “the right people.”

“If you and another member have someone you hate in common, that’s even better,” said Lee. 

When told that his site sounded like another version of President Richard Nixon’s enemy list, Lee, looking confused, asked, “When was he president?” 

Members of FuckYouIHateYou.com are encouraged to increase their enemies list as fast as possible.

“The member who lists the most enemies any given week can win prizes, trips, even a car,” said FuckYouIHateYou.com’s membership vice president Toby Benwick. 

The perfect people to list as enemies, Lee said, include “anyone who ever dissed you or anyone you refer to as an ‘ex’. That could be an ex-girlfriend, ex-wife, ex-husband, ex-boyfriend, ex-lover, ex-employee. Ex-bosses are always good, too."

Members are encouraged to post pictures and video clips of the people they hate.

“Our staff always does a round of high fives if a member’s enemy dies,” said Benwick. “That’s just the coolest.” 

Membership to the website is free. Advertisers on the website include divorce attorneys and various hate groups, including the Ku Klux Klan. Not to be outdone, the Nation of Islam is considering what Benwick describes as a “huge” sponsorship opportunity on the site as are the country's leading political parties.

Benwick said some of the site’s members and their selected enemies are scheduled to make special appearances on daytime television talk shows. 

“We look forward to our first smack down with the FuckYouIHateYou.com people,” said Jerry Springer.