Age Limits On The PB&J? Sacrebleu!

Joe Pisani, a new pen pal, and I recently swapped emails about the succulent joys and variabilities of that great American sweet and salty sandwich, the PB&J.

A retired newspaper editor, Joe recently wrote a column bemoaning his wife's arguments against consuming this notable American fare, determining, in her infinite wisdom, that he was too old for it. 

I wondered why anyone would suggest a sandwich, especially one as innocent as peanut butter and jelly, had an age limit for consumption. When does that kick in? 40? 50? 60? I'm not sure. Maybe we need to issue fake IDs – which states we’re younger than we are – so we can continue to eat these things well into our dotage.

After reading his column, I emailed him, saying that if her opposition continues, he should inform her that he's heading out for a Big Mac and fries.

 

"That'll make your PB&J look like health food," I wrote. 

 

And then, I added what I figured could be the coup de grace: "Tell her the PB&J is plant-based."

 

There are studies – from the University of Michigan no less – suggesting the PB&J could lengthen your life by more than 30 minutes. Compare that to the hotdog. It might shorten your life by the same amount of time.

 

Since these two delectables go hand-in-hand with American culture and identity, perhaps we need a follow-up study to determine if consuming both simultaneously negates the nocent effects of the hotdog. 

 

From what I can tell, health authorities aren't advocating for a moratorium on consuming PB&Js – at any age. They suggest, instead, using jelly without added sugar and whole-grain bread. There don't appear to be any guidelines on peanut butter, but those same authorities note it's low in saturated fat, making it a better choice than a hotdog, a hamburger, or that roast beef sandwich you may crave.

 

I always found the PB&J a joy, both in my youth, when I brought one to school daily, and, at times, during my professional career. It offers sanctuary from adult issues and pressing management problems – deadlines, revenue, profits, and occasional personnel problems.

 

My favorite way to make one is to smother one slice of whole-wheat bread with grape jam and another with creamy peanut butter. To add extra spark, I lay down a thick carpeting of butter before swiping the creamy peanut butter over it on the same slice of bread. 

 

Of course, my doctor threw a hissy upon learning about this, so, at his urging, I changed my ways. Now, the sandwich consists only of organic jam and peanut butter made with less salt and sugar – and, of course, organic, whole-grain bread. 

 

This latest version is a far cry from those dicey days when I gambled with fate. But there are times when we’re called to protect ourselves against ourselves.

 

What brings about the sandwich’s popularity?

The military, of course. 

 

The U.S. Army says the PB&J gained a foothold on the American palate starting with the Doughboys fighting in France during World War I; the National Peanut Board says the sandwich became part of the rations for U.S. military personnel during the next world war. And The Saturday Evening Post reports there are estimates suggesting “the average American” will consume about 3,000 PB&Js during their lifetime. 

Like many American sandwiches, and Americans themselves, the PB&J is malleable. Over the years, I've learned some enjoy pickles on theirs while others adorn their PB&Js with freshly sliced fruit. The combinations are likely endless for this great American sandwich.

 

So, make it any way you want. And remember – short of slathering it with butter, ham or some other animal protein, it's plant-based – and might even extend your life by 30 minutes!

 

Good luck, Joe!

The Conundrum & The Cancer: One Man's Story

If you want to talk about confusing, let’s talk prostate cancer.

The statistics show about 313,000 men will join former President Joe Biden as prostate cancer patients this year, reports the National Cancer Institute (NCI). 

 

Around 36,000 men die annually from prostate cancer, says the NCI, representing nearly 6% of all deaths attributed to cancer. Coincidentally, prostate cancer statistics mimic those of breast cancer in women.

What does the prostate gland do in a man? The National Library of Medicine reports its “most important function is the production of a fluid that, together with sperm cells from the testicles and fluids from other glands, makes up semen. The muscles of the prostate also ensure that the semen is forcefully pressed into the urethra and then expelled outwards during ejaculation.”

 

If my experience with prostate cancer is indicative of what the former President experienced, the Sturm und Drang over what the doctors knew about his health – and when they knew it! – plus a report in The Wall Street Journal saying he was last screened for prostate cancer in 2014, could be channeled into more meaningful conversations and better science.

 

Is there a way to improve prostate health? How can a man reduce his chances of becoming the next man hobbled with prostate cancer? That’s a sampling of some of my questions.

 

In 2018, the results from my annual physical, which included a blood test and an examination of my prostate, were solid. Other than a nagging cholesterol issue, I was fine.

 

I exercised regularly – and still do – and consumed a lot of broccoli and avocados, which, if nothing else, helped reduce the chances of becoming a cancer patient. Rarely did I eat red meat due to reading studies suggesting a possible connection between its consumption and prostate cancer. 

 

Sometimes my diet was a source of contention. At Five Guys, my sons often scorned my order while eating hamburgers, cheeseburgers, and drinking milkshakes. I’d order the veggie sandwich and water, instead. French fries were (and remain) my guilty pleasure.

 

So, as I entered my doctor’s office for my annual physical a year later, there wasn’t any reason to believe I had prostate cancer. All went well, and the physical examination of my prostate suggested everything was fine when she announced, “I can’t feel anything.” 

Life changed two weeks later.

The blood test showed an increased PSA (prostate-specific antigen) number, 4.4, which meant it was likely cancer cells infected my prostate. Within weeks, I had an appointment with a local urologist. 

 

Like my primary care physician, he, too, conducted a physical examination on my prostate with the same result. The blood test, however, showed an increased PSA reading, just over 5. During a follow-up phone call, he recommended a biopsy, saying it would show what was happening.

 

“While technically you’re a cancer patient,” he said, discussing the biopsy's results, “the good news is that you’ve got the kind of cancer that should remain confined to your prostate.” 

 

I was a Gleason 6. According to the documents, the cancer cells were benign.

 

After COVID-19 struck, there was another PSA test followed by a visit with the urologist. My PSA continued its trajectory, but there was no reason to take action. So, I continued doing what I always did: Exercised and ate broccoli and avocados copiously, sometimes with a side of blueberries.

 

In January 2022, I visited my urologist after a second biopsy. The results were different. I was a Gleason 7 because the cancer cells had spread.

 

“There’s a 2% chance they’ll leave your prostate and kill you,” he said, adding that my prostate needed to be removed.

 

That’s where he lost me. 

 

Even my restricted math skills knew there was 98% chance nothing was going to happen. 

 

Media Power

 

A week later, while listening to Bloomberg radio, I heard an ad for New York University promoting their urology practice, saying there was more than one way to fight prostate cancer.

 

In time, I arranged an appointment and had my records transferred, too.

 

The first thing I noticed about Herb Lepor, chair of NYU’s urology department, was his optimism and smile. He entered the room cheerful, saying that while my condition was something that needed to be dealt with, it was far from a death sentence.

 

He also offered some riveting statistics:

 

n  If a cancer-infected prostate is surgically removed, there’s a 43% chance cancer will return.

 

n  Through cryoablation, something he developed for prostate care, 80% of his patients were cancer-free two years after the procedure.

 

n  Radiation therapy was another option. While it’s effective at killing cancer cells within a prostate, it also risks bringing about cancer in the rectum. 

 

“But first, we need to do an MRI, so we know exactly what we’re dealing with,” Dr. Lepor insisted. “In fact, it’s standard operating procedure.”

 

After the MRI and running through the options once more, I decided on cryoablation, which freezes and destroys the cancer cells. 

Everything went extraordinarily well, and I thank my lucky stars, and the Good Lord Himself, for leading me to Dr. Lepor.

Today, based on follow-up MRIs and blood tests, I’m happy to report I’m cancer-free. 

 

This disease is never a one-and-done fight. I remain vigilant over my diet, continue to exercise often, and pray for good health. 

Each day, I recall three gentlemen who died from prostate cancer. One was a scholar; one was a former assistant secretary of housing in the Obama Administration; and one was a Navy Seal during the Vietnam War and, later, an executive with United Press International. Cancer doesn’t care who you are or what you do. It has one mission – kill.

 

I wish Joe Biden well in his fight against cancer. I hope he makes a full recovery, not only for his sake but also for his family.

Alzheimer's and the Health of Public Officials

Years ago, when covering Massachusetts public schools and the state’s education department for Bay State Parent, a monthly magazine, I had my own run-in when writing about the health of a public official. Instead of it being the governor, or even the president of the United States, it was the Bay State’s education commissioner. Mitchell Chester wielded a lot of power, overseeing the state’s K-12 public schools. 

 

If the teachers’ unions weren’t taking issue with him, it was the parents and others who thought they knew better than he about the best way to educate kids. I interviewed him a few times, and I always found him quite pleasant.

 

In fact, I often thought if the state board of education – to whom he reported – really wanted to sell what the Department was doing – pushing standardized testing, especially Common Core – they should have put on him on the road, doing more public speaking around the Commonwealth. He made a strong case for standardized testing -- “the system needs feedback" -- and he always did it with a smile. He was very engaging.

 

Tragically, back in 2017, he was diagnosed with cancer. The Department didn’t make the news public, but the board of education allowed Chester so much time away from the office they appointed one of the Education Department’s top leaders “acting commissioner.” The appointment and Chester’s health were kept out of the public eye.

 

Then, one Friday afternoon, an incontrovertible source called me. This individual had a lengthy professional history with the Massachusetts Department of Elementary and Secondary Education. They had worked alongside Chester for years and had also served, for many years, on the state’s board of education before retiring. They knew the state’s education Department quite well, and many in the Department fed them documents that weren’t supposed to be seen by the public; this source shared them with me. 

 

They didn’t make the Department look so good, showing that it was being supported, on occasion, financially by the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation so it could enact certain policies – mostly to do with Common Core – they wouldn’t need to be run by the legislators on Beacon Hill for funding. (Talk about a threat to democracy!)

 

Of course, I wrote about it, and that put me on the Department’s well, let's say, "bad list." Not that I cared, of course. 

 

When I heard about the cancer diagnosis, it was a huge story. The Massachusetts Teachers Association knew something was wrong with him, too. As I recall, they were getting it from their members, plus, likely, the rumor mill. 

 

On Monday, I spoke again with my source. As on Friday, they confirmed their source was someone no one expected -- the acting commissioner. I quizzed the source about details about how the discussion came about and mentioned that this better be true. They swore it was. As for the details about their talk, it was surprising and somewhat comedic.

 

Of course, Bay State Parent’s editor and I were in touch on this issue with many phone calls. We saw this as a huge story that needed to be reported.

 

On Monday morning, I also called the state Education Department’s spokesperson. After we exchanged pleasantries, I asked her about the commissioner’s health, telling her what I knew. She promptly went into a 15-minute tirade, screaming that I was the worst reporter she ever met. I replied, saying the sources were solid and she had until 3 p.m. to provide a statement; otherwise, I said, we would update our website with the story -- as is. 

 

She provided a statement. We had a scoop. The commissioner died three weeks later. 

 

So, if a state education department can be highly defensive about its leader’s health, imagine what the Biden White House is going through. It has lots to lose, so they’re being as protective as possible about the president’s health. I’m not a Joe Biden fan. I’m not a Donald Trump fan. As a voter, I feel like that great social commentator and comedian Tom Lehrer once remarked, a "Christian Scientist with an appendicitis."

 

The WSJ’s story on the president’s health was likely as good and objective as could be expected. They quoted both sides. Could it have been better? I think so. But there’s always an editor – no matter if the media outlet sides with the left or the right – driving their reporters to get the story as quickly as possible.

 

As for Biden’s mental acuity, I’ll say this:  His actions, particularly the way he speaks, are reminiscent of the way my mother was just before she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. 

 

It’s important to keep in mind that President Reagan underwent the same scrutiny about his health during his re-election campaign in 1984, which Democrats were all too happy to discuss and push. His first debate appearance against former Vice President Mondale didn’t go so well, and it was thought he was in decline. Reagan acquitted himself in the second one, saying he wasn't about to take advantage of Mondale’s “youth and inexperience.” 

 

It generated several laughs, and Reagan waltzed into victory.

 

Imagine if the Biden campaign did the same.

Save Yourself: Get to the dentist

Truth be told, I hate going to the dentist. It’s not that I hate my dentist. Nothing could be further from the truth. He’s a great guy. In fact, the prospect of having to replace him sends shudders up and down my spine because I’ve been his patient for the last 17 years.

He knows my mouth inside and out. And prior to seeing me, he worked on my dad, so know he’s warned me – on more occasions than I can remember – that since my dad’s mouth is rotten, of the need to be extra diligent at brushing my teeth.

Every time I visit my dentist I think we’re playing some version of the TV reality shows Survivor or The Weakest Link. Which tooth will be voted out of my mouth this time or get drilled down to nothing so it can be capped – or worse? Stay tuned.

My bad luck with the dentist started years ago, when I was about 10 years old. One of my two front teeth wouldn’t come down from the gums. So it was off to the oral surgeon, my dentist said, to figure out was going on. This was back in the early ‘70s, the day and age when the specialists in the trade, not your average, run-of-the-mill, dentist, used x-rays.

They revealed a cyst and within a few days, at a hospital, it was removed. Within a week after the surgery, I finally had my two front teeth.

But that’s not the end of it. I also suffered through about 10 years of braces. Since this was the dark ages of dentistry, my mouth appeared to be one, big metal track. The only thing missing were the trains.

If I still had those braces on today, I’d never be able to fly. In fact, it’s my guess that the airport’s metal detector would have to be replaced after sensing the amount of steel in my mouth.

So, as a result of all that childhood fun, I’ve been pretty diligent over the years – at least since graduating from college – about taking care of my teeth. I brush three or four times a day, rubber tip my gums, floss, etc.,etc.

My wife once observed that it takes about 30 minutes to get my teeth ready for bed.

During one visit to my dentist, I got so pissed off upon hearing the news about one more costly, in-depth procedure that needed to be done that I through up my hands up in frustration and said, “Gerry, I just want to know, how many kids have I put through college?”

“I don’t know. But you bought a few cars,” he replied.

I admired the come back.

My luck at the dentist is so bad that I had two root canals in three months earlier this year. The dentist who performs these root canals, not the guy I usually see, is just like my regular dentist: An all-round excellent practitioner of the trade with a sense of humor.

As he was about to start my second root canal, I said while these hook-ups were a blast, really, I couldn’t keep this up, financially, much longer. So I asked him, what’s the best way to avoid these meetings.

The good news, he reported, was that I was running out of teeth. Thank God for that, I replied.

He then went on to inform me that most root canals happen in molars, the teeth that are farthest back in the jaw. They’re prone to cavities and, if they’ve been drilled and filled, there’s something like a 90 percent chance that they’ll be victims of a root canal.

The material used to fill cavities is porous, allowing all sorts of gunk to seep in there, causing further decay and, eventually, a trip to the endodontist, a dentist who specializes in root canals. So you’ve got to brush the teeth that have been treated for cavities just as well, if not better, than the other teeth that haven’t been drilled if you want to avoid a root canal.

The good news about today’s dentistry is that it has changed, for the better, since my youth. The country’s water is pretty much fluoridated, which prevents a lot of dental problems. In addition, kids, if their parents take them to the dentist, receive care that’s advanced significantly over the last 30 years.

My dentist, in fact, tells me that my sons, ages 4 and 3, will very likely never have a cavity in their entire lives. I hope so. But, he warned me, they may take their teeth for granted so much that they’ll have gum surgery. At least that’s what the dental profession is seeing, so far.

On any given day that I have a dentist appointment, I would prefer to see my physician instead, for a check up on my prostate and testicles. Not that I enjoy it, but, somehow, it’s easier to drop my trousers for a few embarrassing, completely undignified minutes than it is to subject my teeth to the phrase, “Open wide. This won’t hurt a bit.”

The problem, however, is that there’s a link between dental health and overall fitness of one’s heart. This first became news to the general public about 10 years ago with the death of a somewhat famous, and rather successful, columnist, named Lewis Grizzard.

Lewis was truly one of the funniest people to ever write a newspaper column. He knew how to turn a phrase like a few others and was right up there with the likes of Dave Barry and Art Buchwald.

Unfortunately, like too many highly talented people, he passed away early. And his doctors were quoted as saying part of Lewis’ heart problems was his dental health. It was rotten.

If you’ve got bad teeth, there’s a good chance you’ll have a bad heart, the experts say. All that stuff that’s in your mouth – it was once reported there are more than 200 different kinds of bacteria living in anyone’s mouth – can affect your cardiovascular system.

That’s why you need to floss and see a dentist for regular check ups. It’s the first line of defense in maintaining overall good health.

About a week ago, it was reported in The Wall Street Journal, a number of insurance companies are covering more dental procedures because, they’ve concluded, they could prevent “a range of expensive medical problems” in the future.

The reason for the advanced coverage, The Journal reported, was due to “the result of an increasing number of studies linking oral health to general health and well being.”

There are now studies, The Journal said, that report links between bacteria around the root of a tooth and pre-term births. There’s also evidence that “the same bacteria in the mouth” can clog arteries, worsening heart disease and stroke risk.” Finally, The Journal said, diabetics find their blood-sugar levels difficult to control if there’s any inflammation in their body.

So if you’re interested in staying fit, work out, eat right, see your physician – and get yourself to the dentist. It just might keep you alive.